“You’re fired!”

I fired my therapist. I honestly feel a bit traumatized. And I haven’t been right in the head since this went down. After I left therapy on Thursday, I swung by McDonald’s and got a huge bag of food. I entered the store with my mask on and placed my order, but the people workingContinue reading ““You’re fired!””

Misery at midnight

I’ve been depressed all day. I’ve already taken two naps. This was after I cried myself to sleep last night and felt miserable. I consulted the Tarot cards to consider pros and cons of ditching my therapist, and the cards confirmed a lot of what I knew. I’ve decided on a course of action: noContinue reading “Misery at midnight”

What a tangled web we weave…

I’m feeling very discouraged after the therapy session from hell yesterday. I always tell the therapist I want/need EMDR, and the therapist always becomes curious about my past and wants to do talk therapy. The last time this happened, we had the therapist who wound up accusing me of being suicidical when I was, inContinue reading “What a tangled web we weave…”

Help! I’ve been wrapped in cellophane for decades.

So, yeah, this is really depressing. I went to therapy today, and the therapist thinks I’m trapped in childhood. It makes sense. I have idealized views of sex as being spiritual and loving, but I can’t handle the mechanics of it or male nudity, for that matter. Yeah, I’m an overgrown child, like Michael Jackson.Continue reading “Help! I’ve been wrapped in cellophane for decades.”

A Point of No Return

My life has felt so unfocused and undirected lately. I’ve been going to therapy and trying to find help from other sources as well (friends, self-help books, etc.), and I require a lot of down time to process the therapy sessions. I don’t have to process them consciously. But subconscious processing makes me become aContinue reading “A Point of No Return”

The therapy’s going great!

TRIGGER WARNING: PHYSICAL ABUSE AND DISCUSSIONS OF CHILDHOOD SEXUALITY/FETISHES (but in the context of my life, since I’m obviously not interested in exploiting children…) So, I went to therapy yesterday. The therapist thinks that I have some form of early-childhood trauma from before the age of three. She¬† bases this on the fact that IContinue reading “The therapy’s going great!”

A million updates!

TRIGGER WARNING: DISCUSSION OF PHYSICAL ABUSE AND SLIGHT SEXUAL UNDERTONES¬† So, there’s a lot going on with me (none of it horrid–it’s all good), so I can’t imagine how long it’ll take to write this blog post. It’s 3:47 now, so let’s find out. First of all, the fishies are all dead. (Oh. Actually, thatContinue reading “A million updates!”

My jackalope has three ears!

So, I’ve been spaced out and completely unproductive for a long time now. Although I daresay I’m not giving myself credit for what I have accomplished. I’ve written an entire synopsis of the 3-day novella I’ll be writing over Labor Day weekend (as part of the 3-day novella contest). (You’re allowed to do plot outlinesContinue reading “My jackalope has three ears!”

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