The self-appointed vessel.

This book is profound. It’s very optimistic and compassionate. It discusses the dynamics of victims and perpetrators, and the need for such dynamics. I used to have deep thoughts about that when I was eight or nine. I decided I’d rather be a victim, which I was–my parents were abusive–than a perpetrator, because I’d hateContinue reading “The self-appointed vessel.”

Spiritual accomplishments.

TRIGGER WARNING: suicidality, but only discussed in the context of the distant past, and difficult life situations as well. I’m fine!  I’ve been reading a really nice spiritual, New Agey book that my dad bought me, because he’s generous enough to buy me self-help books as a means of helping me work through my issues.Continue reading “Spiritual accomplishments.”

Breakthrough!

I’ve had an epiphany. After discussing my issues with a lot of people, I’ve realized (or come to strongly suspect) that my anger issues are directly related to my mental illness(es), and that taking more medication could be helpful.  For one thing, that would make me feel so much better about myself, as if it’sContinue reading “Breakthrough!”

Medic, we have incoming!

Dear Annie: I found out a month ago that my wife has been sleeping with a plethora of men that she’s met on a dating app. Her profile says she’s single and that she also has a college degree, neither of which is true. She told me she is in love with another man. AfterContinue reading “Medic, we have incoming!”

Really difficult menstrual cycle.

I went to the post office. Seeing that guy again filled me with hatred. Although, to get technical, I didn’t “see” him because I refused to even let his physical energy field enter into mine. All I perceived was low-level filth coming from across the counter. I’ve been thinking about this pattern I have, andContinue reading “Really difficult menstrual cycle.”

Off the deep end!!

Yeah, I’ve gone off the deep end. I’m on my period, I’ve been freshly rejected by a guy (for both love and friendship–he apparently values neither), and then something happened today to bring all of my anger to the surface. I went to the ice-skating rink, and alas, there was a sign out front sayingContinue reading “Off the deep end!!”

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