This is hilarious. I’ve been doing eBay sales lately in order to take advantage of how everyone’s trapped at home with nothing to do but shop online. I sent a message today to a buyer, and I said, “Thank you so much for your business! I appreciate it, so I’ve included a free gift! It’s packaged and will ideally get to the post office this afternoon!! I kind of overtaped the packaging box, but it opens like a cigar box with a lid.”
And she wrote back to me and said, “Thank you. I have always wanted to order. This quarantine has given me the courage to tap into my power.”
And I was like, “Wow, that’s amazing!! Shop on, I say!!”
Yeah. I don’t know if my buyer has a wacky sense of humor or what, but I like her style.
I thought of something else funny. Do you all know how there’s always someone onscreen speaking American Sign Language during the coronavirus newscasts? Like when the president or a governor is speaking?
It got me to thinking, what if the sign language speaker were to get a bit creative?
The governor could be saying, “The death toll has risen, people. We need to engage in more social distancing.”
And the sign lanuage person is signing, The governor is so hot, and I want to have his babies. Do you hear me, ladies?
“I want to thank all the doctors and nurses at the front lines,” says the governor.
I mean, look at him. He’s the sexiest man I’ve ever seen. I wonder if he likes missionary?
“And I want to urge everyone not to attend church for a while.”
Social distancing is the only thing keeping me from hurling my body onto his. That, and his wife. The sign language person points to his wife.
And of course, only the deaf people have a clue what’s going on. That would be classic.