Oh no, this is too funny.

This is hilarious. I’ve been doing eBay sales lately in order to take advantage of how everyone’s trapped at home with nothing to do but shop online. I sent a message today to a buyer, and I said, “Thank you so much for your business! I appreciate it, so I’ve included a free gift! It’s packaged and will ideally get to the post office this afternoon!! I kind of overtaped the packaging box, but it opens like a cigar box with a lid.”

And she wrote back to me and said, “Thank you. I have always wanted to order. This quarantine has given me the courage to tap into my power.”

And I was like, “Wow, that’s amazing!! Shop on, I say!!”

Yeah. I don’t know if my buyer has a wacky sense of humor or what, but I like her style.

I thought of something else funny. Do you all know how there’s always someone onscreen speaking American Sign Language during the coronavirus newscasts? Like when the president or a governor is speaking?

It got me to thinking, what if the sign language speaker were to get a bit creative?

The governor could be saying, “The death toll has risen, people. We need to engage in more social distancing.”

And the sign lanuage person is signing, The governor is so hot, and I want to have his babies. Do you hear me, ladies? 

“I want to thank all the doctors and nurses at the front lines,” says the governor.

I mean, look at him. He’s the sexiest man I’ve ever seen. I wonder if he likes missionary? 

“And I want to urge everyone not to attend church for a while.”

Social distancing is the only thing keeping me from hurling my body onto his. That, and his wife. The sign language person points to his wife.

And of course, only the deaf people have a clue what’s going on. That would be classic.

 

 

6 thoughts on “Oh no, this is too funny.

  1. I heard Ebay sales were up, but how interesting to hear about someone wanting to but never actually making the move to visit Ebay. It really is a market full of wonders! I like her style too!

    I have some deaf relatives and they are really happy having interpreters. Someone even said recently that they hadn’t seen them before and they were so so appreciative. I haven’t paid nearly as much attention to press conferences and briefings as I am now so I didn’t notice. I say that from a place of privilege of course, being someone who does not need an interpreter. How sad it seems now that they didn’t always have someone there, representing them in a way, and speaking to them. Subtitles and I don’t get along, so what if you were a deaf person who also didn’t prefer subtitles instead choosing a real live person communicating with you but instead you had no choice because no one was thinking of the people who can’t hear or hear well? What about before subtitles were even available? What about when they’re not!? I am grateful for my hearing and impressed by sign language and lip-reading.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh wow. It never occurred to me that someone might not meld with the concept of closed captions! They’ve always worked for me, and you’ve just opened my eyes to the reality of finding them unhelpful. 😮 I have mild/moderate hearing loss and some sort of weird auditory processing issues. I’ve really been thinking that I should study sign language!! Just because! And I have the weird belief that everyone in society should speak it. It would help the elderly who have hearing loss, as well as people in a foreign country who don’t speak French, or whatever. So many possibilities!! You’re so right about how thoughtful and helpful it is that there have been sign-language speakers!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I would have to agree with you that it would be excellent for everyone to learn sign language. It feels very privileged and biased to always be talking about what other languages students and people should be learning but never (not that I’ve ever heard) do people say we should learn sign language. My great-aunt and uncle are quite hard of hearing which makes it very difficult to help them on the farm safely while wearing a mask. I’ve been wishing we both knew sign language as I try to use my hands to illustrate what I’m saying (which I yell out so one can hear but then bothers the other’s hearing aids). That would be a beautiful goal for the world. Brilliant!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. YAY! Yes, it would rock! And I totally hear you about the masks. Now that people are wearing them, I’m realizing how badly I need to read their lips, or else it’s just that their voices are muffled behind the mask. Either way, yeah, wouldn’t that rock for us all to speak with our bodies? That’s awesome that you help your great-aunt and uncle on the farm!

        Like

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